Dear Teen,
Many teachers & family members, even parents believe that if they scare you a little by saying statements like “If you do not get good results you will not get a good career or job“. But, it sounds like they just don’t realise the increased pressure you are feeling because of this!
Tip
It could be an idea to sit and chat with your parents or teachers and discuss realistic expectations, so there is not too much pressure being put on you.
In terms of forgetting your notes, excessive anxiety can make it impossible to recall information you have studied. This is normal for anxiety sufferers. Heres a tip to try when studying…
Tip
When you notice the brain dump, get up and take a large glass of water or juice, take 3 deep breaths and start over. Whilst drinking the water notice if it tastes pleasant or not & notice if it hydrates your mouth. Swish it like a mouth wash before you swallow. This will have a calming effect and will help you when you mind feels blank.
This will allow your body to rehydrate and stop the effects of the stress response.
Wired Teen
You have been talking a lot about your procrastination or feelings of being easily distracted. It sounds like you are a Procrastination Super Hero! I understand social media distractions, but the sock drawer! Thats exam anxiety or procrastination and we all suffer from it!
Tip
I am going to help you with a system to deal with your anxiety around study. Once you notice your unique style of putting off study (procrastination) you can then notice when you drift away and start to feel anxious.
How does that help?
This system will help you be more mindful of your own unique procrastination style. It will help you apply the right tactics to overcome procrastination around study and improve your focus.
Paralysed Teen
You shy away from something you think will be hard, or expect judgement or criticism from others. Do you want everything to be perfect before you can study. Waiting for the perfect moment to get everything right… then you notice 3 hours have passed and you are out of time.
Ask yourself what is stopping me? Am I worrying about what people will think about me? Am I worried about failing?
Tip
* Be mindful of the perfection trap. Remember nothing gets done perfectly the first try.
* Notice your anxiety. When you are paralysed with fear notice and be mindful of the negative thoughts that are flowing. E.g I am going to fail. It doesn’t feel good to think like this. Repeat: This is just the anxiety talking if I get it wrong I can try again.
* Find out why you are paralysed with fear. Ask a friend to play the therapist: Get them to ask you why you think you are frozen, get her to continue and ask the reasons for it, listen to your answers and then repeat back what she hears.
* Try to complete tiny goals for studying to help motivate you further.
Bored Teen
You are mostly productive and academic, but when you lift up all your stuff to study you find yourself overwhelmed with a to do list of not so interesting boring things that are starting to pile up!
Tip
* Ask yourself what is stopping me? Is it boredom? You feel like studying isn’t a good use of your time?
* Don’t allow yourself to do what you want to do until you have completed what you do not want to do.
* Notice your procrastination style when you start to study and when feelings of anxiety and boredom surface.
* Repeat: This is just my procrastination style – Lets focus on the task then I can move on to more interesting things.
You need systems and strategies to help get through difficulties that can occur.
I hope you found this helpful. Maybe ask your friends that their procrastination style is; Wire, Paralysed, Bored etc.
You can let me know about the results that you are achieving.
If you have any questions, send me an email.
Love & Laughter,
Lesley.
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